10 Secrets of Sizzling Couples

Photo courtesy of Erik Araujo

  1. See each other as lovers.  Don’t fall into the habit of calling each other “Mommy” and “Daddy” even when the kids aren’t around.
  2. Flirt with each other—even if it doesn’t lead to any in-the-ring action.
  3. Communicate. Go beyond the how-was-your-day-can-you-wake-me-up-early-tomorrow-and-pick-up-the-kids-on-your-way-home. Talk about non-house related topics. Discuss political issues. Your plans for the future. You know, the stuff that used to keep you up until 4AM.
  4. Make each other and your marriage a priority.  Easier said than done, what with the kids, the housework and making a living. But with a happy, secure marriage, everything else will fall into place. Even the sex.
  5. Have fun together.  Whether it's window shopping, gardening or killing zombies, do something you both enjoy--and do it together.
  6. Take care of yourselves and your appearances. Your spouse will not only appreciate it, but you'll also feel good about yourself.  
  7. Kiss each other passionately, for at least 10 seconds, twice a day. No wimpy pecks on the cheek  allowed.
  8. Remember that sizzling sex isn’t for the lazy. It takes effort, energy and planning. Spontaneity is great, but to keep the fire burning, you'll need to plan and work it into the busyness of your lives.
  9. Know that intimacy isn’t all about sex. There’s also intellectual, social, emotional and spiritual intimacy to consider, for a well-rounded marriage.  Keep communication lines open. Support each other. Pray together--for each other, for your kids, for the world, and yes, even for your sex life (God invented sex, you know).
  10. Know that a marriage—and sex—is fluid, changing over time. The heart-pounding, ultra-naughty early days may be replaced by lighting-fast quickies during the toddler years, and may eventually evolve to slow-paced lovemaking or even just cuddling. Don't expect everything to be at the the same level or intensity all the time.

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